Monday, September 19, 2005




I recently realized that because I do not own a cellular phone, my life has no definition. The cellphone has already facilitated the avoidance of face-to-face interpersonal communication. But on the rare occasion when human contact cannot be overcome, the phone becomes a sort of personal resume. Two people exchange cellphones for the purpose of perusal. The model of phone, the picture on the display background, the ringtone - all these things seemingly will tell you much more about a person than a sequence of pleasantries ever will. I have witnessed this ritual countless times. Perhaps the reason for this intense curiosity is the relative novelty of the cellphone, despite the seeming for-grantedness of it all; I cannot recall the last conversation I took part in or heard regarding the specs of a computer, something you could not escape 5 or so years ago. But all it takes is a small sampling of marketing to know that the personal customization of the cellphone might be its greatest draw. And it's not only the myriad options available but the myriad reminders of the existence of said options. All this for a piece of electronics that rarely will cost you more than a small microwave.

So at what point did we decide that our homes do not deserve this same type of personal expression. Despite surprising statistics that show it to be more common in Europe, home ownership is without fear of hyperbole the ultimate of American dreams. Personal success is almost always measured first and foremost by real estate. Even the strength of the national economy is often measured by home sales. But take a drive around the new neighborhoods that are driving those home sales and you will find that it is merely the owning of a home that defines the person, because there is nothing else about these homes that could tell you anything about any of its residents. Deed-restriction is the way of the world now, where you cannot so much as change the color of your door without the approval of a board/committee.

It is probable that the very standing of home ownership as economic lynchpin that has pushed us to this architectural socialism. When your neighbor puts those plastic flamingos on their lawn, your home value takes dip. We shall not stand for it! A call to the community board should take care of that. Nevermind that most could not pick their own house out of a row of pictures of homes from the same development.

Every city has its street that becomes a wonderful display of holiday merriment at during the Christmas season. Neighbors encourage neighbors to particpate by putting up the most extravagant lights, animatronic models, manger scenes, etc. Here it is Habana Ave. in the Busch Gardens area. Every year we join countless other Tampans in our car, headlights off, cruising through the narrow street, taking in the joy of whatever the season might mean to us. A lot of the displays are fairly tacky, but then that's the point, isn't it? Sure, it's pretty hard to leave your driveway through most of December and January, and the electricity bills are certainly astonishing, but you have to figure that if the people living on Habana Ave. thought that these inconveniences outweighed the joy they are bringing to so many, they would have stopped the display years ago. As far as I can tell, they wouldn't have it any other way. And they don't need a community organization to threaten fines on anyone who doesn't participate with full gusto.

I am certainly not of the prevailing opinion that money is the answer to the question. But is it really worth it? With deed-restricted communities and Wal-Marts (yeah, I can't help but sneak in an eleventh-hour shot at Wal-Mart) becoming the norm, the majority answer is becoming a resounding yes. I am just having a hard time understanding what all our money is actually for anymore. If this is what the happiness money has bought looks like, I will wait patiently for plan B. Here's my question: shouldn't our status as richest nation on earth afford us the luxury of a little character?

The game changes everyday so obsolete is the fist and marches
Speeches only reaches those who already know about it
This is how we go about it

- Outkast, "Humble Mumble"


Posted by Joel at 9/19/2005 10:36:00 PM